Brave Hearts
by MycatISLordTubbington
Summary: No Amity has ever successfully completed Dauntless initiation, but perhaps they just never had the right motivation. AU with OC's.
1. Prequel

**A/N: Wow, so, look, I wrote a thing….he he. This is my first Divergent fic, and also the first AU/OC fic I've ever written. I guess a few things to know**

**1. I do not own the world of divergent, tobias eaton, tris prior, jeanie matthews, eric, or any of Veronica Roth's other characters that may appear in this story. **

**2. I do however own Lily, Gideon, Xavier, Sarah, Carla, and any other OCs you might see. Although I do have to give credit to my gf Kaitlin (who does ****not have an ff account, idk why) for helping me create Lily. If reading this makes you want to borrow them, please ask, I like sharing. ****  
**

**3. Lily and Gideon are meant to be one year older than Tris, except in the prequel, in the prequel they are 10 years old.**

_Prequel_

Lillian Abercrombie was not brave. She had been told this ever since her first day of school. The Dauntless are brave, the Amity are not, no Amity has ever completed Dauntless initiation. From her long blonde hair that went down to her waist, to her soft red and yellow dress, with one look you could tell, Lily Abercrombie would never be brave.

But she wished she could be, every day as she watched the Dauntless jumping from trains and climbing walls, she wished she had their courage.

"You're staring again" Sarah said. Sarah was Lily's cousin. A short thin girl with dark hair and a pinched face. Her mother, Lily's aunt, had transferred to Candor on her choosing day, so her daughter had a knack for making all observations out loud. "For the sake of honesty", she claimed, though Lily thought it was really just because her cousin had nothing better to talk about.

"I know" Lily said passively, "I like to watch them."

"Why? Aren't you supposed to hate them?"

"I'm not supposed to hate anyone. Besides, I think they're graceful, it reminds me of dancing, the way they move."

Sarah stared at the Dauntless for a moment before sneering "they look like a bunch of monkeys if you ask me."

A Dauntless boy, running past them, stopped in his tracks and turned towards Sarah, "You're just jealous." He said, "Candors walk around running their mouths acting like that makes them strong, but really you're just jealous that you're not brave like us."

"I am not!"

"Liar!"

Lily gasped, Sarah had been called a lot of names, all the Candor had, but no one would dare call one of them a liar. No one except this boy apparently.

His name was Gideon. He was tall for a 10 year old, with striking blue eyes and black hair. He dyed the tips of his hair a different color every week. Today they were silver.

"Don't fight guys, please." Lily whispered, cowering a little. By now a group had formed around the three of them, the whole fifth grade seemed to be gearing up for a fight.

Gideon's gaze darted between the two of them for a moment, "Aw whatever, you're not worth my time." the crowd around them groaned in disappointment.

"Come on Gideon," another Dauntless boy shouted, "don't give in that easy!"

"Hey," another one said, "if he won't show 'em who's boss, I will." The boy broke from the crowd and snatched Sarah's scarf from her shoulders.

Sarah grabbed at it, but this boy was taller than her. She stomped her foot "I'm telling the teacher!" she cried and ran off.

The boy turned towards Lily, "Are you gonna run away too pansycake?"

Lily straightened her back, standing up real tall the way she'd seen the Dauntless do before a fight, "Give it back" she said, trying to make her voice sound strong.

The crowd around her echoed with a chorus of jeers.

"You want it? Go get it!" The boy balled the scarf up and threw it high in the air, where it landed over the statue the Dauntless climbed. He smirked and walked over to the other Dauntless, who cheered and slapped his back as everyone headed back towards the school.

Soon only Lily was left, staring up at the structure.

"You may as well give up" a voice behind her said, she turned to see Gideon standing a few feet away, "even I can't climb that high, and I'm the best in the whole grade." The comment wasn't boastful, just a gentle fact.

"I can get it." Lily grabbed onto the first handhold of the structure.

"Are you crazy?" Gideon grabbed her shoulder, "you're gonna get killed!"

"No, I won't. I can do it. I've watched you all climb this thing for years, I know how to do it." Lily pulled her self up, climbing higher and higher. She tried to remember every Dauntless she'd seen climb the structure, every placement, everywhere they'd gone wrong. Below her she could still hear Gideon calling to her, and not long after Sarah's voice joined in, along with a teacher's voice telling her that if she didn't come down she'd be in trouble. But she couldn't go down now, she was almost there; and she definitely couldn't look down to tell them that. Lily grabbed the scarf and began her journey down the structure, searching her memory for ever step she'd taken to be sure she wouldn't miss one. Her arms were beginning to tremble and she silently thanked her mother for making sure she never missed a yoga class.

After what seemed like forever, Lily felt her feet touch solid ground, and seconds later there were hands all over her.

Sarah was hugging her and crying "You're such a dummy, how would I have told Auntie Steph you'd died trying to get my scarf, huh. You're completely insane and I'm so glad you're alive!" Meanwhile the teacher was checking her for injuries and muttering about "crazy Amities, don't know the difference between kindness and stupidity" and Gideon was ruffling her hair and going on and on about "so cool!" and "never seen anyone climb that high!"

Once they'd all calmed themselves, Lily handed the scarf to Sarah and smiled "I got it down for you."


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: First off, thank you so much to everyone who reviewed/followed/favorited, it's really the only thing that motivates me to keep posting (probably why my only completed stories are one-shots). I'm going to try and post a new chapter every week, but you know, life happens…but I'll try.**

**Also, I little disclaimer, I started this story concept before reading Insurgent or Allegiant so some things (like Amity) are going to be different than they are in the book. **

Six Years Later, 2 weeks until Choosing Day

Lily's heart pounded as she ran across the school yard. Her breath grew short and she shut out everything but the sound of her own feet hitting the pavement. She saw Gideon ahead, she had to catch him, she couldn't let him-

"I win!"

-beat her again. She reached the "finish line" a tall tree at the edge of the yard, where Gideon was stretching out and waiting for her.

"You so cheated."

"I did not." Gideon chuckled and ruffled her hair, "Aww, don't pout little Amity, you were so close that time."

"One day, Aserath, I swear one day I'll get you."

"You've been saying that for six years, give it six more and maybe it'll come true."

Lily scowled a little, but she couldn't argue, Gideon was right. For six years she could run longer and climb higher, but his long legs gave him an advantage when it came to speed.

"Why do you try so hard anyway?" He asked, "it's not like you need much physical training to live in Amity, unless you're planning to be a farmer."

"And what if I don't go into Amity?"

"You, not an Amity? I can't even imagine. You're too fun for Abnegation, and too nice for anything else, you are Amity through and through."

"Oh and you'd know? What are you psychic now?" The truth was, Lily knew she belonged in Amity, but as choosing day got closer she couldn't help wondering if she could live somewhere else. Gideon had been her best friend for six years, the idea of choosing a life that didn't include him seemed impossible. But then, so did choosing a faction where fighting and aggression were glorified.

Gideon wasn't like most Dauntless, he wasn't cocky or mean. He knew when to pick his battles, and always held true to the one part of the Dauntless manifesto that Lily admired; that the greatest act of courage was to stand up for the weak. Lily couldn't even think of a life without him.

"Race you back to the school!" Gideon took of like a shot and Lily raced after him, the two laughing and weaving around each other as they raced.

Gideon pushed as hard as he could, he knew Lily hated when he let her win, no matter how tempting it was. He had always admired her endurance, her need to prove herself. When he saw her run like this, her long blonde hair blowing out behind her and her long skirt wrapping around her legs, threatening to trip her, he couldn't help but forget the rest of the world around him. Which is why he was paying absolutely no attention to the pothole in the middle of the field and tripped right over it. He fell to the ground, summersaulting across the grass and landing on his back. For a moment the sun above blinded him before Lily's concerned face blocked it out.

"Gideon, are you OK?"

"Don't stop now, run, you've almost beaten me." He chuckled.

Lily laughed before helping him up, Gideon couldn't believe how soft her small hands were. "Come on," she laughed, "what kind of win would that be?"

And that...that is why I know you're an Amity."

"Well, that may be true, but now that your up..."Lily smirked, leaning in close and whispering in his ear "I'm still going to beat you."

Lily ran off and for a moment Gideon couldn't quite register what happened. He had always wondered if Lily did these things on purpose, or if she actually had no clue how seductive she could be. The thought only crossed his mind for a moment though, before he took of after his friend. After all, he couldn't give up that easy.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Whoa, what, two chapters in two days? Who am i and what have done with myself?**

**Again, thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, and followed. You all really make my day.**

Test Day

Lily waited patiently in line for her name to be called. Around her, other Amities were gossiping, giggling, and even singing, but she couldn't be bothered with any of that right now. She wished she could've talked to Gideon before the test, but he she hadn't seen him all morning and now it was too late. She wished she could tell him everything, her fear of losing him after their Choosing, her hesitance to leave Amity, and her hesitance to stay. Recently the gentle vibe of Amity had just become so slow to Lily. She had always found peace in the calm relaxed nature of her fellow faction members, but now it felt like none of them really understood her. Her mother said it was natural for a teenager to feel misunderstood, but Lily didn't think her mother really understood that either.

"Lillian Abercrombie." Lily was pulled from her thoughts when her name was called and she stepped forward.

"That's me" she said meekly. The proctor called out a few more names, "Gideon Aserath" Gideon joined the group, "All of you follow me."

Gideon snuck over by Lily, "Nervous?" he asked.

"Why would I be? We both know where I belong." Did she though? Because right here with Gideon, that's were it felt like she belonged, and that couldn't be right.

Everyone lined up in front of the doors marked with their faction, she caught Gideon's eye just as the doors opened. He didn't look afraid at all, then again, he never did.

In the room was a reclined chair and an Abnegation man standing next to it.

"Lillian?" Lily nodded, "Come on in, don't be afraid. Have a seat and then drink this. The test will be quick and painless, then I'll deliver your results. Any questions?" The man's tone didn't exactly put Lily's mind at ease, but it was clear they both wanted this over with quickly, so she just shook her head and drank what he gave her.

Lily felt her eyes drift closed and when she next opened them the Abnegation man was gone and a table had been set up in front of her with a block of cheese and a knife on it. She heard a voice say, "Choose".

"Hello? Who's there?" Lily scrunched up in her chair.

"Choose!"

"OK, OK, fine." Lily wondered if maybe they intended to keep her locked up in here and for a moment the knife seemed a logical choice, but if she was about to be attacked, maybe seeming helpless would be an advantage. And, if she were just going to be left in here, she'd want something to eat. She took the cheese and the rest of the table and it's contents disappeared. The room was silent, she was alone.

Lily sat back in her chair, nibbling her cheese, when she heard a growling noise behind her. She spun her chair around to see a big black dog growling at her, it's ears pressed back and teeth bared. Lily spun her chair back around, hoping to hide from the dog, but she spun he was in front of her again. It couldn't be the same dog, she looked over shoulder and saw nothing. She spun her chair a little left and a little right, the dog kept moving to always be in front of her.

"That's weird," she thought, "dogs can't teleport...can they?" She was pretty sure they couldn't.

She looked at the dog more closely, he was thin, with matted fur, and she realized he wasn't looking at her, but the cheese in her hand.

"Poor thing, you're just hungry aren't you?" Lily slid out the chair to the floor and broke off a chunk of cheese, tossing it to the dog, who pounced and ate it happily before walking up and laying in front of her, whining pitifully.

"It's ok," she said petting his head and holding the cheese out, "we can share. I don't think I'll be here much longer anyway." The dog ate the last of the cheese and licked Lily's face, his tail wagging happily. She laughed and buried her face in his fur.

Then, the dog disappeared and Lily was back in the chair, with the bored Abnegation man messing with a screen in front of her.

"Congratulations," he said with no enthusiasm, though he tried to look pleasant "you're all Amity. You may go, and remember that all results are confidential, and not to be discussed."


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: Ok, so this is my 2nd time posting this same chapter. For any of you who already read it and are wondering why it's changed, I went back and Lily's character just didn't seem right, so I've changed a few things. Let me know what you think (that's my way of begging for reviews). Also it kind of just…grew. So now it's really long… Hope you all enjoy it =)**

Lily knew she should be happy, that there was no need to make any tough choices now, but all she wanted to do was scream. Or cry. Or punch something, she really couldn't decide. As she walked across the school yard she saw Gideon with his Dauntless friends, Xavier and Jackson, heading towards the trains.

She had to talk to him. Screw secrecy and screw making her own choices, she needed to talk about this and she needed to talk to him. She began to run, sprinting to close the distance between them, she made it onto the platform just in time to see the train zooming past.

"Gideon!" He couldn't hear her, the train was too loud. He had already begun jogging after it. As Lily saw him jump into the car she did the only thing she could think to; she ran faster and pulled herself into the train just before it left the platform. For a moment she was suspended in midair, her hands holding the handle at the door and her feet dangling, before she pulled herself into the car.

"I think you're a little early Amity" she heard a voice say, "initiation starts tomorrow."

She looked up to see Xavier looking down at her.

"Well come on then," he helped her up "Gideon's up at the front of the car."

Lily and Xavier nudged their way through the crowd towards the front of the car. Lily could see the top of Gideon's head, his signature blue hair tips sticking out over the crowd.

"Hey Gideon," Xavier said, "I brought you a present."

"Lily?" Gideon's eyes went wide, "How the hell did you get on here?"

"Same as you, I jumped." she smiled wide, feeling proud of herself.

"Are you crazy? You could've hurt yourself! What the hell Lily, people die trying to get on these things!"

"But I didn't" she could feel her smile growing wider as she realized what she had just done, "Besides, I needed to talk to you."

"About what? What could be so important you needed to jump on a train to tell me?"

Well, I..." Lily didn't know how to answer that. What could she say? _"I tested into Amity but I'm thinking of transferring anyway"_? _"I can't imagine a life without you so I'm thinking of leaving my home to be with you"_? _"I might be in love with you but I don't know I just know that you're my best friend and the thought of living without you makes me so sad and scared that I just want to throw a tantrum like a little child"_? None of those really sounded right, so instead she just put on her sweetest smile and said, "I just wanted to be sure you were still coming to my performance tonight."

That was not the right thing to say. Gideon looked like she had just said "_I just wanted to let you now I plan on growing an extra head tonight and was hoping you could braid it's hair for me". _Which, looking back, she may as well have.

"Ummm, yes, I'll be there..." Gideon was starting to smile a little, before he began just laughing out loud.

"What's so funny?" Lily asked.

Gideon pulled her into a hug and ruffled her hair, "You're crazy, you know that? Absolutely crazy."

"Yeah, guys, the hugging and stuff is all really gross and cute and everything but, we kinda gotta jump now." Xavier said from where he and Jackson were hovered by the train door.

Lily and Gideon pulled apart and prepared to jump.

"You sure to can handle this Amity?" Jackson shouted over the rush of the wind as they neared the platform.

"Well," Lily said, now questioning the logic of having gotten on in the first place, "I guess we're about to find out."

She felt Gideon grab her hand and squeeze it reassuringly, "On three, alright?"

Lily nodded stiffly, the idea of jumping from a moving train was a lot more frightening now that the adrenaline was out of her system.

"Ok," Gideon squeezed her hand tighter as the platform in the distance grew closer, "One, two, three!"

Lily saw Gideon leap out of the corner of her eye, for a moment she stiffed, forgetting how her body worked, and then she leapt. Her delay had pulled Gideon back a little and they both lost their balance when hitting the ground, tumbling over one another. as the sound of the train grew faint they could hear Xavier and Jackson clapping and whistling.

"Way to go guys," Jackson laughed, "great form."

"Maybe they fell on purpose," Xavier added, "I mean it's a decent way to get someone underneath you."

Gideon stood up, playfully smacking Xavier on the head before helping Lily up, "Are you all right, Lily?"

"Yeah, I'm OK." Lily hissed at a pain in her knee as she stood.

"No you're not," Gideon said, "You've scraped your leg halfway to hell. Here let me help." before Lily could protest, Gideon had lifted her up bridal style.

"Gideon, what are you doing?" She gripped his neck tightly, not really sure how she felt about being carried, though Gideon's arms were a pretty big comfort

"I'm carrying back to my apartment so we can bandage your leg up."

"I can walk" she pouted.

"I know that, but there is gravel and dirt and god knows what else in your leg and walking around on it will push those things in deeper and give you and infection which could lead to blood poisoning and possibly the loss of your leg, is that what you want?"

Lily just stared for a moment, "Wow, you're really smart. How do you know all that?"

"You go to the hospital enough times, you learn a few things."

Lily giggled, "You are pretty clumsy, I hope you don't drop me." She held tighter to him and buried her face in his neck. He smelled good, like really good. How had she not noticed until today how good he smelled? And his hair, his hair was so soft. Why hadn't she felt his hair until now?

"It's like a kitten."

"What?"

Oh god, had she said that out loud? OK, play it cool Lily, play it- "Your hair is soft like a kitten."

Xavier and Jackson nearly fell over each other laughing.

"Whoa, are you guys still here?" Lily swiveled her head around to look for them. "I thought you left ages ago to go like, hit each other, or whatever you guys do."

They got to Gideon's apartment and Xavier opened the door for them before he and Jackson left. Gideon walked to the couch and set Lily down.

"I'll be right back, I'm going get something to clean your leg with and some bandages. Don't go anywhere." Gideon smoothed her hair a little and left the room.

"But Gideon," she called out, "I've never been in your house before. How can you expect me to just sit here, I've got exploring to do."

"Explore when you're not crippled!" He called from the other room.

Gideon came back with a bottle of peroxide and a roll of bandages and knelt down in front of Lily.

"Is this the part were you ask me to marry you?" Lily joked.

"Haha," Gideon said, blushing, "give me your leg."

"No silly, you're supposed to ask for my hand."

Gideon rolled his eyes and said "Fine," he took her hand and said, "Lily Abercrombie, run away with me. We can get married and build a little house in the middle of the farms. We'll have 10 kids and raise chickens for a living. So what do you say? Will you be mine?"

Lily pretended to swoon and said "Oh yes darling, but let's raise cats instead of chickens. They can sleep in your kitten hair."

"So it's settled then, but before we run away you need a working leg."


	5. Chapter 4

Several hours later Gideon held on to Lily as they rode the train to Amity. He had told her they could take the bus, but she had insisted she wanted to jump on the train again, and even though she was Amity, Gideon had learned long ago there was no arguing with her.

"You don't have to hold onto me you know." Lily said, "Not that I mind of course."

Gideon loosened his grip a little, but he didn't want to let go. He knew Lily could stand in the train just fine, but he just needed to be close to her. Gideon had been thinking more and more about the choosing ceremony, and he knew that today was probably his last day with Lily. They had said before that nothing would change, but he knew that wasn't true. She would go on to her life in Amity and he would go on in Dauntless and they would promise to visit all the time in the city, but they wouldn't; and one day they would get jobs and families and slowly regress from each other's lives until they finally went from friends to memories. He needed to hold on to her, while she was still there to hold.

Gideon was snapped from his thoughts by Lily pulling away from him as she walked to the open train door, grabbed the handlebar, and swung herself half out the train. Over the roar of the wind he could hear her shout, "Gideon, come look at the sunset! It's so pretty!"

Gideon rushed forward, pulling her back inside.

"Dammit Lilly, are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"Not particularly. I thought you would like it, it's the brave thing to do right?" Lily flashed him a coy smile. "I wanted to see the sunset. This is one of the best views, because you don't have the fence or buildings getting in the way. Besides, it feels so nice to have the wind in my hair, and I may never experience this again."

"Winnie likes standing by the door too. But then she always complains about her hairs getting tangled."

"I don't mind it, but you can tell your sister that if she doesn't want tangles, she could try braiding it. You don't get the same wooshy effect, but it's still nice."

"Thanks," Gideon said, wrapping his arms back around Lily as she started eyeing the open door again, "I'll let her know."

"Do you think they like me?" Lily asked.

"Who?"

"Your family. I can never tell."

"Well, they say they do, and I don't know why they wouldn't."

"But do you know why they like me, or don't like me." Lily seemed wrapped up in her own mind. Like she wasn't really in the moment. Gideon had seen her like this before. When Lily met new people she always went over every bit of the encounter in her mind. She said it was to try and remember what, if anything, she did had made them unhappy, so she could fix it next time; but Gideon thought she was just afraid that they hadn't really liked her. She had met his family plenty of times before, but she still did this every time.

"Well," he said, hoping to ease her mind, "Winnie adores you, she says you're too pretty to hang out with me. Mom likes that you always help her when you stay for dinner. Tessa likes your sense of humor, although she says sometimes you remind her of a Candor."

"What, why?!" Lily looked panicked

"Because you say the first thing that comes to your mind a lot. I don't know that it's a bad thing though, since Tessa does that a lot too." Gideon debated for a second whether or not to mention his father, "And Dad is...Dad. You know, he's quiet about his opinions, but I think he likes you okay."

"That's good, you know how much I worry with them. I'm just always afraid of saying something so Amity that they just hate me."

"Who could ever hate you?" Gideon asked, hugging her closer, "You're the most amazing person I know."

Lily blushed a little, "Thank you, I think you're pretty great too." Lily turned around in his arms and hugged him.

"Promise me that nothing will change after tomorrow. That we will still be best friends, no matter what we choose?" she asked softly.

Gideon lifted her chin to look in her beautiful dark blue eyes. They were brimming with tears, and she honestly looked scared.

"I promise," he whispered, "I will always be here for you."

For a moment they held each other's gaze and Gideon tried to memorize Lily's face. Her shimmering eyes and her pink lips, her pale face and her blonde hair glowing in the orange light of the sunset.

Then Lily pulled away, rushing back to the doors and looking out.

"Gideon, it's time to jump. I can see the station."

Gideon walked over to her and took her hand. He expected her to pull away, but instead she just smiled and said, "Together?"

Gideon nodded, and as Lily turned away he whispered under his breath, "Always."

**A/N Oh goodness, what have I done with this chapter? I don't even, I didn't know I could be this sappy. But it happened soooo, hope you all liked it. And I hope you liked getting a peak in to Gideon's mind for a while. ****Points to whoever spotted the Harry Potter reference.**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N I honestly cannot believe the streak I'm on right now. All of you who have flowed and reviewed and favorited, you are all so great and you make my little heart smile. This next chapter is pretty long so get your popcorn ready. I hope you all like it (and the only way I know you like it is by clicking one of those lovely Follow/Fave/Review buttons at the bottom of the story)**

**Sidebar: The term warhorse in the context I've used it is a slang term I made up. It means a non-dauntless person who dates/sleeps with a lot of dauntless. Kind of a dauntless groupie.**

Gideon sat anxiously in the back of the amphitheater. He had tried to draw as little attention to himself as he could, but Amities kept turning around to stare at him. There were plenty of non-Amities at the show, but he was the only Dauntless in the audience. Sitting alone with everyone looking at him freaked him out a little, he felt like he was on display. Of course, he could go sit with Lily's parents, but her Candor cousins and Aunt were there too, and the only thing worse than a bunch of Amities staring at you, were Candors insulting you to your face.

Gideon had been surprised by the large audience, he didn't think an Amity a cappella group would draw such a crowd. But, there wasn't much public entertainment in the city, so the Amity music shows and Dauntless fights were usually the only options if you didn't feel like making your own fun. Gideon had heard Lily sing before, and seen her group practice at school, but this was his first time at a full concert.

The amphitheater had once been a warehouse, Johanna had petitioned a few years ago to remodel it; _"for morale" _she had said. Now it had a few hundred seats, a small stage and a couple of spotlights that had fallen off the fence and been salvaged and repaired. It looked a little run down, but then, so did everything else in the city.

The lights in the house turned off and a few moments later the spotlights illuminated the stage. The Amity singers were in rows on risers, Lily was in the front, near the middle. She had put her hair in a French braid and Gideon could see flowers stuck in it. She had also changed into the same red dress as the other girls in the choir, although Gideon thought it looked best on her.

The crowd hushed as a redheaded girl in the front row blew a pitch pipe and the choir began to sing. The first few songs didn't have any words, just the group making their voices sound like instruments. It was actually pretty cool. Next was a set of original songs that the Amity took turns singing, all about love and peace and fruit (or something like that, they all sounded the same). Then Lily stepped forward, Gideon remembered her saying that her solo was the last in the show and he leaned forward a little in his seat. Lily took the single microphone and softly sang in a deep voice,

_I'm bullet proof_

_Nothing to lose_

_Fire away, fire away_

The other singers looked confused and started whispering to one another. One by one they started to harmonize in the background, but it was clear none of them knew the song Lily was singing.

_Ricochet, you take your aim_

_Fire away, fire away_

_Shoot me down_

_But I won't fall_

_I am titanium_

Both the performers and the audience became more uncomfortable as Lily continued to sing, but Gideon wasn't paying attention. He thought Lily's voice was beautiful, and sure it was odd to hear an Amity sing about bullets and shooting things, but she just sounded so powerful. She was so into the song, it was like she was in a completely different world; Gideon was entranced by all of it, her voice and her face. It was like he was under a spell.

When the song ended Gideon stood and clapped as loud as he could and cheered at the top of his lungs, before realizing that he was the only one doing so. Lily's parents were clapping, her cousins were not. The rest of the audience hesitated and slowly began to clap politely as everyone took a bow and left the stage. Several people had taken a moment to stare at him before doing so, at which point Gideon considered sinking awkwardly into his chair before deciding to, instead, cheer louder.

The audience began to slowly trickle out and Gideon followed Lily's parents to the backstage exit.

"Gideon." Lily's mother said upon seeing him, "I thought that was you I heard cheering. It's lovely to see you again." She hugged him tightly and Lily's father patted him on the back, a gesture which was still as awkward as the first time had happened. Gideon and Lily's father still weren't quite used to each other.

Singers had started emerging from backstage and Lily came flying out the door with a huge smile on her face.

"Oh my gosh, you all came!" she exclaimed, "Did you like the show? What about my song? Did you like it, I don't think a lot of people liked it. Ariel was upset because I changed it and forgot to tell her but I think it sounded great so I don't get what the problem is. So did you love it?"

"Whoa, slow down, sweetheart" her father said, putting a hand on her shoulder to calm her down, "you sounded great, the show was wonderful."

"That's his way of avoiding telling you he didn't like the song." Sarah chimed in, and Gideon was reminded that she and David, her older brother, were still there.

"Yeah," David said, "I mean, we all know you're a total warhorse, that doesn't mean you need to sing a song about it."

"David!" Lily's aunt shouted, "That was rude and unnecessary. I don't care if you are 18, I can still punish you!"

Shockingly that actually shut David up, not an easy feat. Candor or not, Gideon had always respected Lily's aunt.

"There's no need for yelling," Lily's mom said calmly, "how about we all go around the theatre to the refreshment table. They have cookies."

After a chorus of "yes please" and "no thanks" the adults and Sarah went to get snacks, leaving Gideon, Lily, and David together.

"You know," Lily said to David, "that wasn't what my song was about. If you'd paid more attention to the lyrics you would know that, or was my diction bad?"

"Your diction was great," Gideon assured her, although he wasn't sure what diction was exactly, "and so was your song. You have a lovely voice, it was amazing."

"Well, of course he's going to say that," David snarked, "you were obviously singing to him after all."

"That song was for everyone." Lily said, pouting a little, "I'm sorry you didn't like it."

"It's just so obvious what you were trying to do. I wish you'd just admit it."

"Lay off her, David." Gideon sneered, stepping between them.

"And what are you going to do about it, brute? I'm just being honest with her, she did ask what we thought."

"And now I'm asking you to please shut the hell up."

"Or what? You'll hit me and get yourself thrown out of Amity? Yeah, that will impress her." David asked, smirking, "I was being sarcastic by the way."

Lily grabbed Gideon's arm, gently saying to David, "I appreciate your honesty David, but I think that Gideon and I should go now."

"Go ahead," David said, "but just know this. I know what you're thinking Lily, and you need to stop, or you'll wind up Factionless." David brushed himself off before going over to his sister.

"He shouldn't talk to you like that." Gideon scowled.

"He can't help it, it's just in his nature." Lily said soothingly, "I'm sure he's really just worried about me. But don't think about any of that now, I have something I want to show you."

Lily took his hand and led him away from the theatre, out to the farm neighboring it. She pointed out towards a small farmhouse on the other side of the field and said, "You know, there really is a chicken farm here. It's a cute house don't you think?"

"It is, it's actually...adorable." And it was. Gideon didn't use the word adorable often, but it really was the only word for that house. It was small and pink and it had a little white porch with two rocking chairs and a swing. It was like a doll house.

Lily looked at Gideon, "Wouldn't it be fun to live in a cute little house like that?"

"Yeah, but 10 kids would be a tight squeeze" he joked.

"Good point, some of them would have to sleep with the chickens."

Lily laid her head on Gideon's shoulder, entwining her fingers in his, "We're not gonna have that are we?" she said softly.

"Ten kids?" he asked, "I don't know, seems like a lot"

"I mean any of it. I've been waiting for years, thinking that I had time for all of this and now it's going to be too late."

"Too late for what?"

"For us," she said, "for me to tell you...everything! How much I like you, how important you are to me, how fantastic it's been having you in my life, how I am who I am just because of you, how I think you're perfect and always thought we'd be a great couple but girls are always swarming you so I never told you because why would you be with me when you could be with a Dauntless girl, especially one who is prettier than me. Or how I always hoped you would tell me one day that you liked me so I wouldn't have to tell you first and then we'd fall in love and…" Gideon pressed a finger to Lily's lips to quiet her. She pushed his hand away and said softly, as a tear fell down her cheek, "But now it's too late for all of that."

"No, it's not. It'll never be too late." Gideon said, "We both still have a lot we want to say, and tonight is not the last chance we'll get to say it. So let's just enjoy tonight, okay? There will be time for all the rest another day."

Lily looked up at him, tears flowing down her cheeks, glowing in the moonlight. She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down, standing on her tip toes to kiss him softly on the lips. Gideon wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into him and forgetting everything but that moment for a while.

On the train home that night he went over it all again in his mind; the house, the concert, Lily. He thought about everything she had said, about wanting to fall in love and have a life together and Gideon realized, that was her goodbye. She was right, with him in Dauntless and her in Amity, they could be friends but they could never have a home or a family or a life together. And she was going to choose Amity, so if he wanted to be with her...he knew what he had to do.

**A/N Whoa, that all just happened. Hope you all love it and remember to follow/fave/review!**

**Disclaimer: The song Lily sung was not her own. It is Titanium by David Guetta. Please don't sue me.**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N It's choosing day! POV may get a little funky with this one, I hope it's ok.**

Gideon barely slept that night, every time his eyes drifted closed he spun into a dark nightmare. He stood in front of the city's population, all of them chanting "Choose! Choose!" and when his blood fell he couldn't see where it landed and everyone jeered and shouted "You chose wrong!" Lily's face stood out among the crowd, "Gideon!" she would shout, tears streaming down her cheeks, "How could you? How could you leave me like that?!", and he would wake up to find that it had only been 10 minutes since he'd last looked at the clock.

When his mother finally came into his room that morning he had already given up on sleep and was showered, dressed, and sitting on his bed writing a letter.

"You're up already?" his mother asked, "After all these years of me having to drag you out of bed you choose today to get up on time. Maybe you really are an adult now."

She was already starting to tear up. Gideon closed his notebook and stood up to hug her.

"Aw, Mom, c'mon on, it's not a big deal. I mean it's not like you're never gonna see me again or anything."

"I know, I know it's just... I am so proud of you. You've grown in to such a perfect young man." She pulled away and collected herself, "Well, since you're awake you can wake up your sister, I'm going to go get ready and then we'll go to the pit for breakfast."

Gideon went into his sister's room and shook her shoulder gently, "Winnie, come on sweetie it's time to get up."

The six year old just mumble something and pulled her pillow over her head.

"Come on Win, it's my choosing day. If you don't get up I'll think you don't love me. And then I'll have to go be a Candor or something."

"No!" Winnie sprung straight up and threw her arms around Gideon. He laughed and attempted to get some of her messy brown hair out of his mouth.

"Come on Win, you know I'm joking."

"You are?" She looked up at him with her huge blue eyes.

"Of course, I mean Candor, really? I'd rather be Factionless." He picked Winnie up and carried her into the bathroom, "Now brush your teeth and I'll braid your hair like Lily taught me."

Half an hour later, in the pit, Gideon looked around at all the other kids who would be choosing today. He wondered who would transfer, who would stay, and if any wouldn't make it through initiation. He wondered what the other faction's initiations were like. He knew Erudite took intelligence tests, since that was how they elected a leader, and Candor used the same truth serum that was used on criminals during trials. He had no idea what Amity initiation was like, or if they even had a process.

These questions filled his head throughout all of breakfast and the train ride across town. He is kissed his mother on the cheek, hugged his sisters and went to stand in line with the other choosers. His father was a Leader, so he had left home early that morning to prepare for the ceremony.

Shortly after getting in line, Gideon saw Lily and the other Amities enter the hall and he was reminded of the night before. They hadn't been able to spend much time together after their kiss, her parents had come looking for her to take her home. He suddenly realized he had no idea how to behave around her now. What should he say, or do? How do you treat the woman you're about to change your whole life for?

"Hi" Lily whispered, getting in line next to him. The two of them would be the last to choose today, first Gideon, then Lily.

"Hey"

"Are you nervous?"

"No, why would I be. We just trust the test right?"

"Sure," she gripped his arm and Gideon couldn't tell if it was for her own comfort or his, "don't be nervous. Everything will work out fine." She kissed his cheek softly just before the Amity representative, Johanna Reyes, stepped forward to begin the ceremony. Gideon could see his father and all the other faction leaders and representatives sitting around the stage. Johanna gave the same speech the ceremony officiators always did, at least Gideon assumed she did, he wasn't listening. It felt like years, watching each person before him make their choice. He watched as Xavier and Jackson both chose Dauntless, and Lily's cousin Sarah went to Candor. He held his breath as a Dauntless girl, Julianna, stood over the bowl for a full two minutes before transferring to Erudite; and he couldn't help but smile each time the Dauntless cheered for their new transfers. Even with as long as it took, when his turn came it suddenly seemed he had blinked and missed everyone else.

"Gideon Aserath!" Johanna called.

Gideon took a deep breath and reached out to squeeze Lily's hand before walking onstage. He stood behind the semicircle of bowls, looking out at the audience. He picked up the knife and cut his hand, looking up at his family as he held his hand out. He tried to let them know silently, somehow, that he was sorry as his hand reached out over the bowls. Then he looked at Lily, he had to, to remind him why he was doing this. His hand began to drift over to the Amity bowl and Lily's eyes widened, she shook her head slightly.

"It's ok" he mouthed as he began to tilt his hand.

-4 hours earlier: Amity-

Lily sat on the roof of her house, watching the sun rise over the fields. The farmlands and meadows expanded for what seemed like forever, and Lily had always loved them, especially in the mornings, when they glowed orange and red in the new sunlight. But today was different, Lily had been up all night thinking about the Choosing and was still no closer to a decision. When Lily thought about it, she really believed she could be happy in any faction. She loved learning, so Erudite could be fun, and Candor had never annoyed her as much as others. She liked the Abnegation's passion for helping others, and ever since she was little she had relished in the bravery of the Dauntless. But Amity had always given her so much freedom, as long as she never hurt anyone she could do whatever she wanted. It was a peaceful life and she loved it; but what she really wanted was Gideon. And could Gideon really be happy living in Amity? There were only a dozen Dauntless transfers in Amity as it was, and initiators always judged them the most harshly. One wrong step and Gideon would be Factionless. She remembered how quickly he had snapped when David insulted her, something that aggressive would get him kicked out for sure. No, it wouldn't be right to ask him to transfer for her, not when she could be perfectly happy in Dauntless. She'd always wondered what it would be like to be one of them, to be the first Amity to transfer to Dauntless and stay there, to prove that Amities could be brave. To prove that she could be brave, that she didn't have to be what anyone, be it Gideon, or her family, or some test, told her she was supposed to be. Now all that was left, was to find it in her heart to say goodbye to Amity.

Lily spent the rest of the morning preparing for her new life. She wore her favorite yoga outfit, an orange tank top and red sweats; then she took the locket her mother had given her on her birthday and hid it in the front of her shirt. The locket was silver with the Amity faction symbol on it, when her mother gave it to her she had told her it was so she could always remember her roots, no matter where life took her. It was as if her mother had known, even then, that Lily would leave Amity one day.

As she wandered around her house, Lily found herself touching things a lot, as if trying to absorb their memory through her fingertips. It almost felt like she was dying, like she was never coming back. But she needed to stop thinking about things that way, this wasn't the end of the world. Her parents would still love her no matter what she chose, she could always come back to this house to visit. And she was going to be with Gideon, that's what she wanted, right? And she wasn't just transferring for him, she knew that, there was something else drawing her towards Dauntless, the same thing that had propelled her to climb that statue six years ago. She just didn't know what it was yet. Maybe it was a need to prove herself, or a desire to be some kind of hero, or maybe she just had a death wish. She figured the answer would come in time.

"Time to go!" her mother's voice chimed as she poked her head through Lily's door, "Come one darling, you don't want to be late for such an important day."

Looking at her mother's smiling face Lily felt tears welling up in her eyes and she launched herself into her mother's arms.

"Oh sweetie," her mother cooed, "don't you start now. If you cry then I'll cry, and then your father will come in here and he'll cry and you'll never make it out the front door."

"I'm sorry Mom," Lily said, "I'm just nervous. What if I choose wrong?"

Her mother cupped her face in her hands and said, "There, there darling, I know that it's hard growing up, but let me tell you something very important. In your life there are going to be people who will speak out against you for your choices, but you must find it in your heart to forgive them. Because even if you think differently from other people, that doesn't make either of you right or wrong, or better than the other. It's important that you always stay strong and be brave, but never ever stop being kind, that way they can never win. And most importantly darling, always stand by your choices, no matter how hard that may be."

Lily didn't know what to say. Her mother hugged her again and then led her out of the house to where her father was waiting. Because her father ran a farm he had his own car, so Lily and her family were driving some other groups in the area into town.

"Ready to go kiddo?" Her father asked as her ruffled her hair.

"As ready as I'll ever be." Her father helped her into the truck and kissed her forehead before going around the car to drive.

When they arrived at the Choosing Ceremony about an hour later Lily scanned the room for Gideon. Upon seeing him she felt a mixture of pure bliss and absolute terror. What if he didn't what her to transfer? What if he thought she was weak? What if after last night he realized he didn't like her the way she liked him and now he didn't want to see her anymore? What if he wasn't even staying in Dauntless? What if he had decided to transfer to Candor and become a judge and marry David? Ok, now she was just losing her mind. Even if Gideon were going to transfer and marry a man, it would be to like, some Erudite or something, not Candor.

Lily hugged her parents good bye, pushing away the thought that it could be the last time, and walked over to Gideon, trying to smile.

"Hi" she smiled

"Hey" Gideon sounded tense.

"Are you nervous?"

"No, why would I be? We just trust the test, right?" Gideon sounded so certain of that. She was sure he had gotten Dauntless, he knew exactly where he belonged.

"Sure" she said lightly, _"no" _she thought. She was doing the exact opposite of what the test told her to do. It was like flipping a coin to make a decision, if you liked the outcome then the coin was magic; and if you didn't, then it was just a stupid coin. She grabbed onto Gideon's arm, using him to ground herself in the moment.

From that point on time passed in a blur, Johanna's speech, the names, the choices, she couldn't remember anything even a second after it happened. Before she knew it Gideon's name was being called and she was left standing alone.

She watched him walk up the stairs and cut his hand, then he looked right in her eyes as his hand began to inch towards Amity. Wait, Amity? What the hell was he doing hovering over Amity? She shook her head at him but he just mouthed "it's okay." It was not "okay" not at all. He was just standing there with that look on his face that he always got right before doing something that he though was clever but was really very stupid. And this was very _very _stupid! Gideon didn't belong in Amity, and neither did she. Lily glared at him and softly whispered, making sure he would be able to read her lips perfectly, "Don't. You. Dare."

Gideon watched Lily, reading her lips carefully. He knew that face, he had seen it several times before. Usually if he didn't do what Lily told him to when she used that face, he wound up doing something that landed him in either detention or the hospital. She was serious, she didn't want him to do this.

He felt his heart break a little, did this mean she didn't want to be with him? He looked down as the blood on his hand gathered, it was almost overflowing. At the last second he snapped out of it and shifted his hand, letting the blood fall over Dauntless coals.

Lily let out a sigh of relief as Gideon stepped towards the cheering Dauntless.

"Lillian Abercrombie!" Johanna called out. As Lily stepped forward Johanna smiled kindly at her, Lily had always been fond of Johanna. When Johanna had been elected Lily had painted her a picture to congratulate her. She probably wouldn't keep the painting after this.

Lily's mind was empty, she couldn't see or hear anything. There was only the knife and the sizzling coals. She knew her choice, it was easy, now she just had to make it. She picked up the knife, holding her hand out over the bowl and slicing deep, hearing only the sound of her blood, sizzling on the coals. Seeing only the fire burning in the embers.

**A/N I'm actually wildly excited right now, I hope you all are too. If you want to show me just how excited you are (or how I could make the story more exciting to you) you can press that lovely little review button or just Fav/follow.**

**Remember, inside those buttons are magical fairies that fly into my brain and make me write, the more you click the faster they fly!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Hey Everybody, I'm sorry about the long wait for this chapter. I went on faction over easter and muse decided to just stay on vacation I guess. But now she is back, with this new chapter! Thank you all for the lovely reviews and fabs and follows, I feel so loved 3. Also a few people have asked me what Lily and gideon look like so the new cover photo for this story is how I imagine Lily and my author avatar, if you go to my profile, is kind of what Gideon looks like (except with blue tips in his hair because I couldn't find a good picture of a guy with blue hair).**

**Ok, I'll stop rambling, enjoy!**

Lily's blood fizzled out on the coals with a hiss, and there was silence. There were no cheers, there was no applause. Lily stood as the entire city stared at her, not making a sound. She found her parents in the crowd, her mother had tears in her eyes, but they looked proud nonetheless. She pulled her gaze from them and looked to Gideon, he looked like he had been slapped in the face. She realized Johanna had not yet called out her chosen faction and she turned to look at her. The Amity woman was staring at her, terrified. Johanna whispered shakily, "Dauntless".

The tension could be cut with a knife, and then Lily heard a voice shout "Dauntless!"

She saw Xavier stand up and clap and cheer, followed by Jackson, and then by more Dauntless. The cheers swelled into a battle cry, and the Dauntless rushed towards her, Xavier grabbed her hand and pulled her out to the stairwell. She couldn't see Gideon anywhere, he hadn't stood or cheered when everyone else did.

Lily swung her head around, searching for him, but the Dauntless around her were too fast and too many. The swarm of black engulfed her and she had to put all her focus on the stairs under her feet and keeping up with the pace of the crowd. The Dauntless burst through the doors and began to sprint down the street. Inside, their cheers had echoed, blocking out any other sound or thought; out here, they were a chorus, lifting her up and making her feet fly and her heart soar. She tilted her head back, feeling the wind on her face and in her hair, as she whooped and cheered along with them.

When they arrived at the train tracks the Dauntless started climbing the support beams, she saw a flash of blue hair near the top and rushed towards it, only to realize the hair belong to a Dauntless girl, not Gideon.

"Your boyfriend can wait!" She heard a voice behind her say, and a Candor boy grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the beams, "He already made it to the top, now come on."

She followed the boy up the beams, relishing in the strength and pull in her arms. Ever since climbing that statue in fifth grade, climbing had been her favorite exercise. When she reached the top the Candor boy was waiting for her.

"I'm Luther" he said.

"Lily," Lily smiled at him and then looked out over the street. The Dauntless formed a rainbow of colors in the street with their hair, it was absolutely beautiful. She could see Xavier and Jackson climbing the support beam a short ways away, pushing and shoving at each other playfully as they raced to the top. Just below them she saw Gideon jump to a bar and pull himself up.

"You said Gideon already made it to the top," she looked at the Candor boy incredulously.

"I lied," He grinned, and then turned and began to jog away. At first Lily thought he was running from her, until a gust of wind hit her and the train begin to roll past. She broke into a run as she chased the train, pulling herself on with ease. When she turned around she saw Luther at the door, trying to keep up and tripping over his own feet.

"Don't help him," she looked towards the voice and saw a tiny Erudite girl standing next to her, "it won't look good for either of you. He needs to prove he can do this, and you need to stop acting like an Amity."

Lily stared at the girl for a second before just smiling a little and swinging out the train door grab Luther's hand. She pulled him into the train and then looked back at the Erudite girl, "There's no reason I can't still be nice, changing factions doesn't mean I need to become a bad person."

The Erudite girl chuckled, "Well, aren't you just a ray of sunshine. I'm Maya."

Maya was petite, almost a foot shorter than Lily, and she had short dark hair that fell over one of her almond eyes.

"I'm Lily, and this is Luther. Luther's a Candor, except apparently he lies a lot." She looked back at Luther, who was about her height and had icy blue eyes and chocolate hair.

"Not a lot," he said defensively, "but you weren't going to climb if you didn't think Gideon was safe. So you're welcome." He crossed his arms and cocked his hip. He reminded her of Sarah.

"Oh no!" She gasped, "Gideon, he was still climbing when the train came, what if her didn't make it?"

Lily pushed past them and started making her way through the train. She was in the last car and it was mostly empty, so she crossed over to the next one. With each car she passed through she grew increasingly nervous, until she reached the front and saw him standing with Xavier and Jackson. She ran towards him and he turned towards her just seconds before she leapt into his arms. He held her tight, lifting her off the ground and kissed her.

"There you are! I was afraid you didn't make it, are you okay?" he began lifting her arms and hair, looking all over her for injuries.

"I'm fine," She laughed, "better now that I found you. I saw you climbing when the train came and thought you might not have made it up in time. Are _you _okay?" She playfully mimicked him, lifting his arms and spinning him around.

"Oh he's fine," Xavier said

"Aside from the brain damage," Jackson added, "That is what it was right? The reason you thought you could be an Amity." he grabbed Gideon shoulders and knocked on his head.

"Oh man," Xavier laughed, "I nearly had a heart attack when I saw it. You standing with your hand over that bowl-"

"With that dopey look on his face." Lily finished off, "Me too. What on Earth were you thinking?"

"What was I thinking?" Gideon exclaimed, "I was thinking that, last night, you told me that's what you wanted!"

"I never said anything like that."

"Then what was all that talk about time running out, and our lives together ending and-and-chicken farms!" Gideon looked baffled, "A better question is, what were you thinking, transferring to Dauntless."

"I wanted to transfer to Dauntless, is that so hard to believe?"

"Then why couldn't you tell me?" by now, neither was playing anymore, and Lily realized for the first time, Gideon wasn't angry at her. He was hurt.

She stepped forward and hugged him, resting her head on his shoulder, "I'm sorry" she whispered, "I'm so sorry. I didn't know what I was going to choose, and I didn't want to make a promise I couldn't keep."

Gideon held on to her, keeping her close, "You really freaked me out back there."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Never."

People were lining up at the train doors and Gideon and Lily made their way over, peering out the window.

"This isn't the station." Lily said, confused.

"No, this is for initiation only, that building up there," Gideon pointed, "leads to the back entrance to Dauntless. I've never been up there before, but I've heard of it."

"We have to jump all the way over there."

"It would seem so." He looked down at her and asked, "Are you still sure about this."

"Absolutely."

Gideon grabbed her hand as they neared the building, "Then I'm with you, every step of the way."

They stepped back from the door, preparing for a running start.

"On three?" Gideon asked.

Lily nodded, squeezing his hand tighter.

"One. Two. Three!" the two of them rushed forward, leaping out of the train and over the gap.

And they hovered, weightless, in the air.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: This chapter is a little short but you get to see a few new sides of Lily. Hope you all like it. 3**

Lily felt all gravity disappear for just a moment, and then she was plummeting towards the ground. She slammed into the roof and felt her legs buckle underneath her. Gideon wrapped his arms around her, keeping her up. Next to her Xavier was helping Jackson off the ground, Jackson shirt was torn and he had a scrape on his forearm, like he had landed on it. All around her people were getting up and brushing themselves off, then she heard someone scream.

She turned and saw an Erudite boy on the ground, his ankle was twisted around backwards and bleeding heavily. She had broken her own ankle like that once, when she was seven and feel out of a tree, she tried to remember what the doctor had done then. She rushed over to the boy, and knelt beside him, "You're going to be ok," she whispered softly, "you're gonna be fine." She gently pulled up his pants leg, looking at the wound. It was like the rest of her mind had turned off, all she was thinking of were facts. It wasn't a clean break, the bone was splintered, and it was broken above the joint. She couldn't reset the bone, but she did need to stop the bleeding. She took off her jacket and tied it around his leg tight, just before she was pulled to her feet.

A man was standing less than six inches from her face, and he was yelling at her. She snapped back to reality as he shouted, "...do you have any idea how much worse you could have hurt him! You stupid girl, you could have caused all kinds of problems if you had kept up what you were doing! What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking," she said loudly to cut him off, then proceeded calmly, "that he had a bad break in his leg and the bone was splintered, therefore making it difficult to reset. I was also thinking that a break like that would cause perfuse bleeding and I needed to stop that bleeding. I was also thinking that there is all kinds of dirt and gravel in that wound and that stopping the bleeding would lower risk of infection which you must admit is very high. And most importantly, I was thinking that he was hurt and I didn't see any doctors around, and no one was helping him. I knew how to help him at least to a point and so I did. And, with all due respect, Sir, I am not stupid, I knew exactly what I was doing."

The man just shook his head and muttered, "An Amity with a mouth on her, who knew?" before pushing past her to assist the other doctors who had been working on the boy.

Lily made her way back over to Gideon, Xavier, and Jackson; who were all looking at her in amazement.

"Where did you learn to do all that?" Jackson asked.

"When I was 14, I wanted to be a doctor so I read a few of medical books."

"Well it was awesome!" Xavier was grinning like a maniac, "you were like some kind of super hero, the rest of us were just standing there like 'whaaaat' and you were all like-"

Gideon held out a hand to quiet him as a tall man with buzzed blonde hair and piercings began to speak.

"Well, that was exciting wasn't it? You can expect to see a lot more of that during your time here, that and worse. My name is Eric, and I will be watching over your initiation. But before we can get started, you have to get in, and there's only one way to do that. The entrance to the Dauntless compound is down there," he pointed over the edge on the building, where he was standing, "jump and you're an official initiate, don't, and you're Factionless. Who wants to go first?"

"Is this some kind of a test?" Maya asked from the front of the crowd, "to see who's so stupid they'd actually jump just because you say so."

"It is a test," Eric said, "to see who wants to be here badly enough. One thing you will learn here is to trust your commander. It is not my job to kill you off."

"You wouldn't know it by looking at him." Lily jumped and turned to see Luther smiling at her.

"Do you always sneak up on people like that?" She whispered.

"No, but I think I may start, it's fun."

"I'm gonna ask one more time," Eric said, "any volunteers?"

"Let me go!" The blue haired Dauntless girl Lily had earlier mistaken for Gideon stepped forward. She was a bit shorter than Lily, but she looked really strong. She had a tattoo of a paw print on her arm and her hair, Lily could now see, was teal and shaggy, falling into her face.

She stepped onto the ledge and leapt, letting out a loud "Whooooo!" that grew softer as she fell.

Eric watched as she fell and then turned back to them, looking completely unimpressed.

"Next?"

A few Dauntless born raised their hands and shouted; Eric scanned the crowd before his eyes landed on Gideon, "You. You're the one who hovered over Amity at the ceremony, aren't you?"

Gideon looked down at the ground, ashamed, and said, "Yes, sir."

"Well, then I'd say you have a lot to prove don't you? You're up flower boy."

Gideon straightened his back, his eyes were dark and determined in a way Lily had never seen until now. He walked forward, a stride in his step, he really did have something to prove. Lily couldn't help thinking it was her fault his loyalty was being questioned.

As he stepped on the ledge and looked over, Eric whispered to him, "What are you waiting for, do you need your girlfriend to order you to jump?"

Gideon turned towards him, looking him sternly in the eye, and snarled "I don't take orders from anyone," and disappeared over the edge.

Gideon was barely out of sight before Lily called out, "Me next!"

Eric saw who had shouted and scoffed, "Alright then." He gestured to the ledge and she stepped up. Below her she saw a light flash twice and Eric said in a smooth voice, "Jump if you want, just remember, it doesn't make you Dauntless."

Lily just smiled kindly and him and chirped, "We'll see" before leaping into the abyss below.

She hit something springy, a net, a bounced up in the air a few times before someone pulled the net down and she rolled off. A muscular man boy about a year older than her helped her down and asked, "Name?"

"I'm Lily, what's your name"

**A/N: I promised my friend Sierra a shout out in this chapter. The first jumper is based on her. If any of you are in the Teen Wolf or Troop fandom her pen name in GayWolfie 66**


	10. Chapter 9

"I'm Lily, what's your name?" Lily smiled at the boy who helped her out of the net. He did not smile back, instead he just turned to the crowd of people and called out, "Third jumper, Lily!"

The crowd clapped and cheered as Lily found Gideon in the crowd and went to join him.

"He's not very friendly." She frowned looking at the boy manning the net.

"No, he's not," Gideon laughed, "That's Four, he's transferred over last year. Top of his initiation group, he was Abnegation, so I don't think he ever learned how to have fun."

Lily giggled.

As more jumpers came down Lily began to get restless. The dim concrete room was very different from what she was used to in the Amity field or glass schools. She was starting to find it hard to breath and she shrunk into Gideon nervously.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yes, it's just a little cramped down here. It wasn't like this when I was here before."

"Don't worry, when we get upstairs you'll feel better, and I think we're near the end."

A blur of white and black fell into the net and four called out, "Last jumper, Luther!"

Everyone clapped and cheered, and then people began to leave.

"Alright, transfers you're going to come with me," Four said, "Dauntless-born can go with Lauren."

"I'll see you later." Gideon whispered and kissed Lily's head before heading over to the Dauntless-born group.

Lily moved over to the transfer side of the room, standing next to Luther.

"Wow, that jump is really a rush, huh?" Luther was bouncing on his toes, either with excitement or nerves. Maybe both.

"Why did you go last?"

"I thought it might be like that Erudite girl, Maya, had said. You know, like a test of who was really dumb enough to jump. Jokes on me I guess."

"Did you think they would just kill us all off and leave you the last one standing?"

"No I just thought-"

"Stop talking," Four's voice wasn't loud, but it was stern and harsh, "my name is Four and I will be your initiation leader. Your initiation will consist of three stages. The first will be physically training your body. You will learn to fight, use weapons, and believe me when I say we will push you to the breaking point. The second part of your training will teach you to be calm in stressful situations and to strategize in a moment of danger. Stage three, we will test how well you have learned the lessons from stage one and two and if you fail the test you will not be accepted into Dauntless. Any questions?"

"Do we get to fight the Dauntless-born?" The question came from a muscular Erudite girl with blonde hair.

"No, but you will fight each other, and you will be tested and graded alongside the Dauntless-born."

Lily felt a sense of dread wash over her. Until this point she had completely forgotten that she would have to fight people. She would have to hold weapons and hurt people. She couldn't even imagine it.

"When you fight," Four continued, "you will continue to do so until one of you can no longer continue or until one of you concedes. Also your participation and progress will be tracked through each stage and count towards your final result, so don't think you can get out of training by conceding every fight. Anyone else?"

After a pause he continued, "Everyone follow me, I'll show you to your room."

"Room?" Luther piped up, "As in singular."

"That's correct."

Several of the other initiates looked perturbed by this, but Lily didn't mind. In Amity they shared nearly everything.

"This is the pit," Four said to the group as he led them into the large, arena-like space that Lily had seen before, with Gideon. "The pit contains all the Dauntless Compounds shops and food sources, you will eat here and if you need or want anything, clothes, a tattoo, and so on, you will get it here, so long as it is after training. Training lasts from 8am to 6pm with a lunch break, outside of that time you can do what you want so long as you do not leave the compound. The exception being if you are chaperoned by a Dauntless adult, not an initiate."

Four stopped in front of a huge hole in the middle of the pit.

"This," he said, "is the Chasm. It is very deep, entirely made of stone, and there is a rushing current at the bottom, fall or jump in and you will die."

"Then why is it here?" Luther asked, "It sounds like a safety hazard."

"Only if you are stupid." Four stared at Luther, moving towards him, "If you are smart it can't hurt you." He turned back to address the group, "The chasm is to remind you of the line between bravery and stupidity, do _not_ be stupid, understood."

There was a murmur of agreement.

"First lesson of Dauntless we do not mumble, now answer me clearly. Do you understand?"

Everyone shouted their own confirmation, it was still a jumble of voices, but a loud one.

"Good enough." Four sighed.

He led them past the storefronts in the pit and out of the corner of Lily's eye she saw a flash of color. She turned to see a tattoo parlor display window; the artwork was beautiful. Lily was drawn to the storefront and wandered over to it, admiring the detailing in the sketches. In the corner of the case there was a floral design, roses intwining with such perfect form. It was better than any Amity artwork she had seen.

'Hey- hey Blondie, Amity!"

Lily was brought back to the moment by the sound of Four's voice. She turned to see the entire initiation group had halted and was staring at her.

"You can pick out a tattoo later, come on you're holding us up."

Lily blushed and rejoined the group. Even though Four was just a year older than her, she felt like a chastised child.

Four led them downstairs and opened a door.

"This is where you will be living for the next 8 weeks, after initiation, if you make it through, you will be given homes on the main floors."

The room was mostly bare, with a line of bunk beds on either side of the room.

"That door." Four pointed to the left of the room, "Leads to the toilettes. The other, to the showers. In the trunks at the foot of your beds you will find standard Dauntless training gear, you do not have to wear it but I would advise it. Dinner will be served in the Pit in an hour until then you can feel free to meander around, though I would advise that some of you," he turned his head slightly, looking right at Lily, "not get too comfortable. You won't be here long."

After Four left, Lily walked over to one on the bunks and opened the storage trunk at the foot.

"Hey Lily," Luther said, leaning on the bed, "wanna be bunk mates?"

"Sure," Lily smiled, she pulled out a set of clothes that looked her size and began to change.

"Wow," Luther raised his eyebrows as Lily stripped, "you sure aren't shy, are you?"

"No, I'm used to changing in front of people, before gymnastics and concerts and stuff."

"Well that boyfriend of yours sure is lucky." Luther gave Lily a once over, letting out a breath, and then examined the crowd of new initiates.

"So what do you think? My bet's on Veronica."

"What?" Lily was confused.

"Of who our biggest competition is!" He sounded exasperated, "I mean you would think it would be that Candor guy, Jason, 'cause he's big, but I got into a fight with him last year and he is actually so pathetic. Veronica, on the other hand, is from Erudite which means she's smart, so the strategy phase is probably going to be easy for her. Plus she's built like a tank, so fighting should be easy for her too."

Lily recognized Veronica as the blonde girl from earlier, the one who had hope to fight the Dauntless-born.

"I don't know," Lily said looking her over, "she looks cagey. Like maybe she's hiding something. It could just be an act. Shouldn't you be able to tell all this?"

"There is a reason I transferred," Luther said, "I was always better at lying than lie-detecting."

"If that's true then how do I know if I can trust you?" Lily asked coyly.

"You don't, but you're an Amity so you will anyway."

Lily frowned a little.

"I'm not an Amity," She said slowly, "I'm Dauntless now."

**A/N Sorry this chapter was a little on the slow side, but it'll pick up again soon I promise.**

**In the meantime, send me a review, tell me what you think! I really do care 3 Also i want to know what y'all think of Luther sooooo…*pushes review button towards you and hides*)**

**And, as always thank you to everyone who has followed/faved/reviewed. You guys really make my life.**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N So since the last chapter wasn't very eventful I decided to get this one up quickly instead of making you all wait. Hope you like it!**

Lily scanned the pit for Gideon, but in the sea of Dauntless, it was nearly impossible.

"There he is," Luther pointed to a table in the middle of the pit. Gideon was there with Xavier, Jackson, and the first jumper, whose name Lily didn't know.

"Who's the cutie?" Luther asked, still looking at Gideon's table.

"The blue haired girl? I don't know, but I think she's leaving."

"No not her," Luther sighed as they made their way through the crowd, "The brown haired guy. The tan one?"

"Oh, that's Xavier. He's Gideon's best friend."

They made it to the table and Lily hugged Gideon from behind.

"Hi sweetie," she said, kissing his cheek, "This is my friend Luther. He helped me find you. Also he thinks Xavier is cute."

She sat next to Gideon as Luther stared at her in shock.

"Wow," Jackson laughed, "that was blunt. Are you sure you weren't supposed to be in Candor."

"Why would I want to do that?" Lily asked

Luther sat next to her, composing himself, "I believe he was commenting on the fact that you tend to blurt things out. I've known you less than a day and I've figured that out."

"I don't see what the problem is," Lily said, grabbing a bread roll, "if you think he's cute you should just get it out there."

"Says the girl who strung my best friend along for six years." Xavier smirked.

"And I learned my lesson. So am I the only one that totally forgot we would have to fight during initiation?"

"Yes." They all said at the same time.

"How's that gonna work?" Jackson asked, "I mean, you've like, never even been allowed to insult people. How are you gonna hit them?"

"Yeah," Gideon said, nervously, "I mean it's one thing to be able to run and climb on stuff, but fighting an actual person is different, and you're probably the only transfer who hasn't started practicing yet."

"I guess I'll just fake it, or take a lot of beatings..." Lily really hadn't thought about the idea that the others had been practicing for this, that they didn't make up their minds at the last second.

"Well, I mean the point of training separate from the Dauntless-born is that we haven't practiced as much as them right?" Luther's voice was shaky, "It makes it more fair that way..."

"But, you've fought before haven't you?" Xavier asked.

"Well, yeah, yeah a little."

"I'll figure it out." Lily said, determined, "I can do this, don't worry about me."

Gideon smiled softly and said, "I'm still gonna worry, but I know you can do it."

Jackson and Xavier shared a look and pretended to gag into their food.

"You know what you need," Xavier said, "to feel like a Dauntless."

"Yeah sure," Jackson joked, "'Feel the Dauntless, Be the Dauntless, Live the Dauntless'. What she needs, man, is to practice. Why don't you just start practicing on the punching bags and stuff after hours? They leave the training rooms unlocked."

"We'd offer to help but it's against the rules." Xavier added.

"I will, but I also think Xavier's right. I need to make a change. Something to feel like a part of this place."

"Oooooh, you could get a tattoo!" Luther exclaimed, "Or, like, dye your hair! You would look so cool with pitch black hair."

"Actually," Lily smiled, "in Amity we have a tradition of only cutting our hair after major life events. The last time I cut mine was when I got my first solo in choir. If there was ever a time for it, I think it would be now."

"Well what are we waiting for?" Jackson said, "Let's go people! We're all getting haircuts."

Jackson and Xavier hollered and jumped up and ran to the edge of the pit. Luther jogged after them, but Lily and Gideon took their time.

"You aren't really gonna dye your hair black are you?" Gideon asked.

"No, but it would be nice to do something fun. We aren't allowed to use hair dye in Amity."

"I could help you." He whispered.

"Dye my hair?" She raised her eyebrows, "I think I'd rather have a professional do that."

"No, I could help you train."

"But, I thought-"

"I know it's against the rules but, I just know that you can do this and I want to help."

Lily hesitated, "I'll think about it, okay?"

"Okay." Gideon kissed her gently, holding her close.

"Hey, guys come on, you can make out later, and the hair place is gonna close!"

They pulled apart at the sound of their friends' voices and ran to catch up with them.

When they got to the salon it was empty, besides the employees. Gideon's older sister, Tessa, was rearranging some dyes on a shelf.

"Hey Tessa, you guys aren't closed yet are you?" he asked.

"No, but it's pretty late for so many people, if you're all going."

"Come on sis, you can stay open a little late can't you." Gideon fluttered his eyelashes like a little kid.

"We can stay open a while longer." the receptionist said.

Tessa rolled her eyes, "Fine, everybody hop in a chair, we'll make this quick."

Jackson, Xavier, and Luther all jumped into their chairs, making them spin.

"I can do my own" Gideon said, walking over to the dye station.

Lily sat in a chair and Tessa stood behind her, making eye contact in the mirror.

"So, I just want to cut it a little, like shoulder length," Lily motioned the length with her hand, "And maybe do some color? I'd love a pink streak."

"We can do that." Tessa led her over to the sinks and washed her hair, then led her back and began cutting.

"That was a pretty bold move you made this morning." She said to Lily, "You've got Gideon wrapped around your little finger don't you?"

"Ummm, I don't know. I mean...I don't..." Lily was at a loss for words.

"Just know this," Tessa leaned down to whisper in Lily's ear, "I know what you are, and if you hurt my brother, I will tell everyone."

Tessa stood up and smiled, "Now, let's get that color on shall we?"


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hey all, this is a short ****chapter but I promise I'll have another one up really soon. Also, this story has hit 50 Followers! *throws confetti* Thank you all of you, you make this story special 3**

** Enjoy =D**

"Are you okay?" Luther asked, "You've barely spoken since we got to the hair place."

"I'm fine, it's just, the haircut, you know? It's an emotional experience." Lily lied. She was still trying to figure out what Tessa had meant. "_I know what you are..." _she had said. Did she mean she knew Lily tested into Amity? What else could she mean? Lily just couldn't wrap her head around it.

"Well, I think it looks great." Luther said, "and it was so sweet how Gideon dyed his tips to match your pink streak."

Lily smiled a little; she caught a glimpse of herself in a glass display window and stopped to look at her hair again. It was just barely grazing her shoulder, and there was a hot pink streak framing her face. She looked like a whole new person.

"It is nice isn't it? Tessa did a good job. Although I'd be worried about what people will say about yours."

"What do you mean," Luther ran his hand over is hair, which was now bleached white and buzzed short and smiled. "I look sexy?"

"I mean you just transferred from Candor into a faction that wears only black, and you go with white hair. Don't you worry they'll think you're trying to hang on to Candor a little?"

"Not any more than you should worry about that pink streak. Besides, it's just hair. I bleached it because it makes my eyes sparkle. If I wanted to be a Candor I would be a Candor, I don't need hair to prove I belong here."

"Of course." Lily looked at her feet. Could she prove she belonged here? Everyone kept telling her she didn't, and now Tessa was making threats, she was beginning to worry she'd made the wrong choice.

"Stop that." Luther said.

"What?"

"Stop questioning yourself. I can see it on your face. You'll never convince anyone you're Dauntless like that."

Lily frowned, "You can't just expect me to stop behaving like myself. That's lying, I'm not a liar."

"You sound like a Candor; and furthermore, yes I can expect that. You are not in Amity anymore, if you want people to see you as Dauntless you need to act Dauntless. I may be able to tell that you're only here for Gideon..."

"I'm not."

"Sure you aren't, but you need to prove to everyone you are here because it's what you tested into, and nothing else."

"And what makes you think I didn't test into Dauntless?"

"Ha, please," Luther scoffed, "you aren't fooling anyone yet, so let's not overstep our limits 'kay Hun? Fortunately you haven't really interacted with anyone else yet. Starting tomorrow you need to show everyone that you are leaving Amity behind, no more Ms. Nice girl."

Lily tried to process what he was saying. She knew she hadn't tested Dauntless and she knew everyone else could tell that, but... "Being Dauntless doesn't have to mean being cruel." She snapped, "Gideon and his friends are Dauntless, and they're nice."

"They were also born here, they grew up here. Everyone believes they that belong here. And the other transfers and me, we can hold out some hope that we can make it because other people from our factions have done it before. Every Amity who has ever transferred to Dauntless either leaves, gets kicked out, or dies within their first month; that's why no one has tried in years."

Lily felt like she may cry, she couldn't let Luther see that, "I'm going to the training room. I'll see you later." she turned on heel and walked away. When she rounded the corner she bolted. She flew through the training room doors and slammed them behind her before falling to the floor against it and sobbing. In her mind she could here everyone's voices.

"_Lily, are you crazy?"_

"_You don't belong here, Amity." _

"_I wouldn't get too comfortable."_

"_You aren't fooling anyone."_

"_I know what you are."_

Lily needed them to stop. She walked to the middle of the training room and sat on a mat, crossing her legs and breathing deeply. She had learned about meditation from the Amity fitness teacher, Shannon, who taught all the Amity non-aggressive exercises like gymnastics and yoga.

She tried to clear her mind, but that last voice stuck in her mind. _"I know what you are" _Tessa had said. Lily understood now. Tessa had never liked her, or approved of Gideon being friends with her. She thought Lily was just some silly Amity who would crack in the first round and then pull Gideon down with her. But Tessa couldn't frighten her, Lily wouldn't let her. She would prove to Tessa that she belonged here. Tessa and everyone else.


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N A new chapter as promised. And there shall be more soon I assure you. **

**Happy reading 3**

After about an hour in the training room Lily had finally calmed down, and headed back to the dorms. When she got there she was surprised to find everyone still awake, and when she looked at the clock she realized it was only 9:30. She spotted Luther, talking to Maya, and went to join them.

"Hey, you're back." Luther smiled, "Maya and I were just talking strategy. We figured we'd probably start fighting right away, so we were putting our people skills to use, sizing up the competition."

"Why is it just you two, and not anyone else?" Lily asked. "It seemed kind of mean to leave everyone else out, if everyone got together and talked we could probably find a way for us to all get in."

"You just don't get it do you?" Maya asked, although Lily didn't think she really wanted an answer.

"Maya, I got this," Luther put his arm around Lily's shoulders, "look around, Lily, we are the underdogs here. Maya is barely 4'11", I have the body structure of a bean sprout, and you have never fought a day in your life. Now look at everyone else, they are big and tall and strong. They are not interested in helping us because they already know they can make it through, and the worse we are, the better their chances. All we have over them is brainpower, and we need to make it work for us."

"Oh, that's a pretty good point." Lily was finally starting to realize just how grim this looked. There were six other initiate transfers, two from Erudite and four from Candor. Four of them were boys, all beefy and muscular. Lily actually got a good look at just how strong they all were, because at the moment they were standing around comparing muscle sizes. One of them, the boy from Erudite, was nearly six feet tall, and could probably lift Lily with one arm.

The two girls, one from Erudite and one from Candor, looked slightly less formidable. The Erudite girl looked strong, but she was shorter than Lily, and kept looking shiftily at the boys, like they were going to attack her at any moment. The Candor girl was probably the closest match to Lily, body-wise, she was tall and thin. But her spiked black hair, pierced ears and face made her look Dauntless already.

"Why do they all look so scary?" She whispered, "Some of them already have tattoos and piercings, and they're all huge!"

"Now do you understand?" Maya sighed, "These are people who joined Dauntless because they want to hurt people and live with as few rules as possible. So we've been trying to spot their weaknesses based on what we know about them."

"Ok, so what do we know?"

"Well," Luther said, "Jason is big, but he has really low pain tolerance. I learned that last year."

"Then there's Owen," Maya continued, pointing to the Erudite boy, "Huge but slow, and he tires easily. I saw him climbing the stairs at dinner and he was winded halfway up the first flight. If you can dodge him 'till he's tired, then you can beat him."

"Next there's Blair, the Candor girl, she can barely see out her right eye. Maya figured that out earlier."

Across the room a Candor boy banged his head on his bunk and then punched Owen when he laughed.

"That one's Rod," Luther chuckled, "clumsy as a bull, but with twice the anger issues."

"What about the other two?" Lily asked.

"We haven't figured them out yet." Luther sighed.

"Oh, okay then." Lily frowned, "Well then I guess we just need to hope none of us gets paired with them tomorrow. If we can watch them fight then we can figure out their style."

"Speaking of fighting style," Maya said, "are you like some kind of psychopath or something?"

Lily stared at her, "I'm pretty sure that question has nothing to do with fighting style..."

"I mean, you transferred from Amity. Normally Amity/Dauntless transfers are easy to spot, but you weren't. Even now you're still acting like an Amity. You're either a master manipulator or/and a complete idiot for being here. So which is it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Amities are pacifists, obviously you are not, so how did you keep it so secret? I mean, even Gideon didn't know."

"That's because I'm not hiding anything. I am a pacifist."

Luther shook his head at her.

Lily heard a sharp cruel laugh behind her, and turned to see the other two girls walking towards them.

"A pacifist?" the strong one, Veronica, mocked, "So what are you going to do, hug us all into surrender?"

Blair laughed and smiled at Veronica.

"No," Lily said, "I'm just not going to fight more than I have to."

"Awww, isn't that sweet," Veronica bent down and pinched Lily's cheek. Lily flinched but didn't pull away. "And maybe they'll let you use a water gun instead of a real one. You wouldn't want to accidentally hurt the bad guys, would you?"

She spoke with the same tone Lily used to talk to her 2-year old neighbor, only meaner.

"No, that would be ridiculous..." she whispered.

"Yeah, almost as ridiculous as you being here in the first place, though I have to hand it to you, you take war horse to a whole new level."

Lily's jaw tightened and she bit her tongue. As Veronica and Blair walked away Luther whispered, "Don't just let them walk away, this is your shot."

Lily stood, puffing out her chest and said, "I wouldn't underestimate me if I were you."

Her voice came out smaller than she had expected it to, it was barely a squeak, but Veronica still heard. She turned and laughed again.

"Underestimate you? And how, exactly, is that possible when you have nothing going for you? Every odd is against you right now. I don't need to make any judgments about you. I just need to sit back and watch you fail."

Veronica and Blair cackled as they disappeared through the shower doors, leaving Lily stunned.

Luther reached up and rested his hand on her shoulder, "Hey, Hun, don't be upset, 'kay?"

"Why would I be upset?" Lily smiled, "I just figured out Veronica's weakness."


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hello eve****ryone, so sorry for the super long wait. I was hit with a huge case of writers block =(  
**

**But in the meantime, the story broke 50 followers! I never thought I would have so many people actually wanted to read this story, let alone would be willing to get their inboxes spammed by new chapters =) Thank you all soooo much, and now I think I've kept you waiting long enough. enjoy! **

Gideon yawned loudly as he headed into the training room. He had been up all night worrying about Lily. After the hair salon she had rushed off, claiming that she needed her rest, and he spent the rest of the evening wishing they could have at least gotten some basics in before training began. Xavier and Jackson had tried to reassure him, claiming that there was no way Four would just throw them all in the ring on the first day, and he should just worry about himself for now.

"_I know you want to help her, but it doesn't do her any good if you get kicked out." _Xavier had reminded him.

Now he looked around the room, searching for Lily. He spotted her on the other side; but he also spotted two rings, two lines of punching bags, two of everything. It was clear that he wouldn't be venturing over to the other side of the room anytime soon.

"All right everyone," Lauren called for their attention, "as you can see you are going to be training alongside the transfers, but don't think that means you will be training at the same level as them. You are Dauntless-born, that means there are no excuses with you. I expect every one of you to be the prime example of what new transfers are striving for. You'll will train longer, faster, and harder than them, and you will never once complain about it. Now I'm pretty sure I don't need to teach any of you how to fight, if I do then the faction has already failed you, so everyone get in front of a punching bag and we'll do a run through..."

Gideon found a punching bag, across the room he could see the transfers doing push-ups, punching the bags, and running around the room.

"Why is Four just letting them run wild like that?" he whispered, "Shouldn't he be teaching them or something?"

"Maybe he is," Jackson suggested, "I mean, they need to get in shape, right?"

Gideon shook his head and continued on his bag, he'd really hoped Lily would get some technique training from Four today.

About an hour into training, Lauren had run the dauntless born through every exercise imaginable and now had them competing do see who could do the most of one exercise or another, at the moment it was how many push-ups in a minute. If her intent was just to make them look more polished than the transfers, then it was working. Four hadn't barked a command in forty-five minutes, and the transfers were beginning to look like children on a playground rather than soldiers-in-training.

"Hey Four," Lauren called out "are you running an initiation over there or just babysitting?"

"They're building stamina." He said curtly.

"Really, because it looks like they're just goofing off."

Four ignored Lauren, so she egged him on.

"I mean really, those pansy-cakes wouldn't last a day in a really Dauntless training course."

"It's their first day. They'll improve."

"They're going to fail. I thought you were supposed to be training future Dauntless, not the Factionless of tomorrow. I knew Max made a mistake assigning you this job."

Four clenched his jaw and then shouted, "Abercrombie, Lewis, in the ring!"

Gideon's heart jumped. He watched as Lily slowly climbed into the ring, followed by a large, brutish boy, twice her size. Lily smiled sweetly at him, Gideon wanted to run forward and pull her out of the ring. She wasn't ready. She didn't even seem nervous, she was underestimating the danger in front of entirely!

"Gather up everybody!" Lauren waved them over, "Take a look at your competition."

"Hi Jason," Lily was grinning at her opponent, "this is gonna be fun don't you think?"

"This ain't a drum circle, Amity."

"I know that..." Lily said slowly, regarding him as one might regard a toddler, "it's a fighting ring. You knew that, right?"

Gideon couldn't help but chuckle when he realized, Lily was messing with this guy. He could see it in her eyes. He was a little less worried now, but he still bit his lip and rung his hands when Four began to list off the rules of combat.

"You will fight within the ring only, using whatever hand-to-hand method you see fit. The fight is over when one of you surrenders or when one of you cannot continue. Begin!"

Gideon held his breath as Lily and Jason tiptoed around each other, Jason swung at Lily and she dodged, sidestepping him easily. Another punch and she ducked. Her reflexes were quick, but Gideon knew she couldn't keep up this dance forever. Then lily did something Gideon never saw coming, she kicked. She threw her leg out, overshooting a little, and her shin hit Jason in the arm. He stumbled back a little, grabbing his elbow, and wincing. Gideon could tell from where he stood the kick hadn't been that hard, he wondered what Jason was playing at.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sorry!" Lily gasped, her hands flying to her mouth before reaching out to check Jason's arm. He threw her back against the edge of the ring and she fell. He shook his arm out then pushed her down with his foot to hold her in place. He looked up, smiling at the crowd, pleased with himself.

Gideon stared him down, mentally daring Jason to make eye contact. Jason looked right at Gideon then froze. His face drooped and his eyes widened. Gideon held his gaze, his most primal instincts taking over. He knew he'd told Lily he would let her take care of herself, but she needed him, and if Jason so much as breathed on her again he would rip him to shreds. Jason looked at Lily on the ground and then stepped back. "Well then, get up and fight." he said, he tried to sound strong but he voice cracked. Lily stood slowly, raising her fists. They went back to toeing around each other, and after a few minutes without a hit Four stepped into the ring.

"That's enough," he said, "You're both just embarrassing yourselves. Everyone, go run 20 laps around the training room. And if that is difficult for you then you need to get out now, so no complaints."

"You all go to" Lauren called to the Dauntless born, "show the newbies where they need to be."

As Gideon turned to start his laps he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Four not two inches from his face.

"You can't protect her forever," Four whispered, "She needs to look after herself."

"I don't..." Gideon wasn't sure what to say, but Four had already let him go and begun jogging behind an Erudite born girl who was running too slow for his taste.

Gideon sped up to find Lily, jogging alongside her when he caught up.

"That was good back there." He said.

"It was awful."

"No, you took it like a pro, it was good for your first fight." He reassured her.

"I can't believe I just hit somebody. I've never hit anyone in my life."

Gideon tugged her off the track behind a stack of wrestling mats. She looked like she was going to cry.

"Gideon, I don't want to do that again. I feel so bad. God what was I thinking." She gripped her head like it would fall off if she didn't hold it in place and sobbed.

"Baby, Lily," Gideon gripped her shoulders to steady her, "look at me. You're ok, and Jason is ok. You just need to train."

"No," Lily insisted, "I can't do that again, I just can't."

"So what then? You're just going to leave, become Factionless?"

"I don't know," she cried, "I don't know."

"Okay," Gideon said slowly, pulling her into his arms, "look, we can figure this out. Come meet me back here after dinner tonight. We are going to make this work."

"You promise?" Her eyes shimmered with tears and she looked at him like her whole world relied on his answer, which, he supposed, it did.

"I promise."


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: So, I want to apologize again for taking so long to update, but I feel like you guys probably are sick of that. So I'll just let you read. (But Rome, you just ****a polo-. _yes I know, moving on_)**

Lily had never felt so ashamed. How could she have deluded herself into thinking this would be easy? She had hurt someone; she had made contact with another person and hurt him, on purpose. She didn't know what she had been thinking, had she thought all Dauntless did was run around and climb things? She didn't belong here.

When she kicked Jason a sense of dread had fallen through her, she couldn't feel that way again. She kept trying to rationalize it, telling herself that it was just self-defense, that it was just training; but none of it made a difference. She could hear her mother's voice telling her, "There is never an excuse for violence, Lily. When you make excuses for violence you allow it to enter your soul." She wondered if her mother was ashamed of her for choosing Dauntless, or if she thought Lily was evil now. That's what she had been taught after all, that the Dauntless were cruel and evil. But with Gideon she had convinced herself that it wasn't true; Gideon was sweet and kind, there had to be room for kindness in Dauntless.

She didn't go to dinner that night. Instead, she waited until everyone had left and then returned to the training room. She stood in the middle of the ring, replaying the events of that morning in her head.

_She was standing across from Jason, her arms up to defend her self. She had remembered what Luther had told her, that Jason had a low pain tolerance. She looked in his eyes and saw them shift to her stomach. He made a slight move towards her and she new he was about to swing at her. As his arm extended, she jumped back and kicked. The kick was so soft it was almost comical; it didn't even sting her foot. But then he was wincing and gripping his arm, she had hurt him. For a moment she was proud, but then the pain in his eyes melted her heart and she let her guard down. Amity instinct kicked in and she was apologizing, her eyes filling with tears. And then she saw his eyes move again, this time to her shoulder. She saw him lunge but didn't stop him. He pushed her back and she fell to the ground. She could have stayed on her feet, and she had plenty of time to get up; but she stayed down. As his foot fell on top of her she winced at the pain, but didn't fight back. This was her punishment; this is what she deserved for hurting him. _

The one thing Lily couldn't figure out was why he had stopped. He had her pinned, he could have knocked her out, but he didn't. She wondered if maybe he had just wanted another go at her, to hurt her as much as he could and make her surrender. It seemed like the sort of thing he would do.

"You're early." She looked up at Gideon as he locked the training room door and joined her in the ring.

"Just eager to get started." She smiled; she couldn't let him see how scared she was.

"Now that's the attitude I like to see," he tapped her on the nose and then dropped to sit cross-legged on the floor, "sit down."

He looked so happy, so carefree. She wondered if he really was this positive, or if he was faking it like her. She felt awful lying to him, and she wasn't sure if him lying back would make her feel better or worse.

"Do you think I'm weak?" she asked.

"Of course not," he reached out and took her hand, "we all freak out a little the first time we hurt somebody. You're just having your moment later than the rest of us."

His icy blue eyes were so accepting, so warm; she threw herself into his arms, holding tightly to him as she started to cry.

"Gideon, I don't know if I can do this. I don't want to hurt people, I don't."

Gideon held her tight, stroking her hair and rocking her as she cried. Once she had calmed herself a little he pulled back and cupped her face, kissing her cheek and whispering, "It's going to be okay. I promised you that everything would work out and it will."

He wiped the tears off her face and pulled her to her feet, "What happened today was totally normal Lily, all you need is training."

"I thought today was training." She said.

"For your body, yes, but we need to train your mind. You need to escape what Amity taught you, and learn the difference between fighting and violence."

"What's the difference?"

"Violence is done out of a desire to cause pain. Fighting in the ring is sport. It's for fun, or for physical fitness. And fighting for necessity, that's just doing what you have to do."

"But, I hurt him." She couldn't get past that.

"No, you didn't, I saw that kick. He was faking in in hopes that you would feel bad. It was dirty trick and it worked, you can't let someone get to you like that again."

"But, if her was just faking it…that was the closest I've ever come to purposely hurting someone before. If I can't even do that right how am I supposed to get good at this?"

"You're going to practice. Here, in a safe space. You're going to get used to the feel of fighting another person, by fighting me."

"What? But I don't want to hurt you. You're one of the last people on Earth I would ever want to-"

"I know," Gideon cut her off, "that's why you'll be practicing against me. If you can get used to fighting someone you care about, it will make it easier to distance yourself when fighting people you don't know or don't like. You're not going to only be fighting Jason; you'll have to fight Luther too, and any other friends you make."

"But I…" Lily trailed off. She couldn't hit Gideon; it would be like hitting a puppy. It was just too mean.

"No buts. I promise you, I can take whatever you throw at me. Now, hit me." He took a fighting stance and bounced around a little. He looked kind of ridiculous if she was being honest.

"I can't," she giggled a little, "especially not with you bouncing around like that. You look too sweet."

"Fine, I'll try to look meaner." He planted his feet and snarled, twisting his face into an overdone sneer. "How's this?" he asked through gritted teeth.

"Not much better." She laughed.

"Come on," he smiled, "just hit me. Right here." He turned sideways and flexed his arm, pointing where he wanted her to hit.

She made a fist and punched lightly.

"Like this," he took her hand, forming it into a fist, "you punch with these knuckles right here, and you put your whole body into it." He placed one hand on her hip and the other on her fist, slowly moving her body through the steps.

"Now try again." He held out his arm again.

She punched a little harder, holding back at the last second.

"You can do better than that, come on!"

She swung again, this time feeling her hand collide with his arm, a dull pain spreading through her fist.

"One more, really go for it." This time she punched at full force, exactly how he'd shown her. Her fist on his arm made a dull thumping noise, and when she pulled her hand back his arm was red.

"Oh my gosh, are you okay?" she asked

"I'm great" He smiled, "and that was really good."

"But, your arm is all red." She stared at the fading mark she had left on his skin, her eyes wide. She couldn't believe she had done that. Se hadn't known her body was capable of so much force. She felt terrified and strong and ashamed and powerful. Her breath was short and her heart was racing, she wasn't sure if she should apologize, or smile, or spontaneously combust.

"That's nothing," Gideon chuckled, "my little sister has done worse to me. But it's a good start."

"Okay, but, can we be done for now? I think if I do that again I might start crying and then never stop."

"Of course," He pulled her into his chest and hugged her, "it's all okay, you did great. I'm so proud of you." He cupped her chin and kissed her, "You're going to get really great at this. I just know it."


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Hey everybody. This is a bit of a filler chapter but I promise there'll be more really soon. The past few weeks have just been really busy. I hope you all like it anyway.**

There were no more fights that week. Four had told them all they were "too pathetic" to fight and they would be working on fitness all week, which pretty much meant running all day. Meanwhile, during her training with Gideon, Lily was improving rapidly. She was no longer afraid to hit Gideon, although she avoided it whenever she could, and they had begun sparring. She realized quickly that she couldn't take a hit very well, and she still refused to throw the first punch; they mostly focused on dodging.

At the end of training Friday night, Four informed them all that fights would resume on Monday, "And if anyone makes a fool out of me I'll see to it you're Factionless by dinner." he added.

"Are you nervous?" Luther asked Lily.

"A little, but I've been practicing on my own a lot and I think I'm ready."

"I hope I get someone tough." Maya said, "You know, like Veronica or Owen. Someone big."

"Why, do you have a death wish?" Luther asked.

"That is exactly why." She stuck her finger in his face, "Attitudes like that; you all underestimate me."

"Well sorry, it's just you are like, pocket sized" He scoffed.

"You're one to talk, Last Jumper."

Luther just gaped at her.

"Maya, there's no need to take shots like that." Lily scolded, "If you want to tease him just comment on his willowy frame and pixie face."

"Hey!" Luther laughed, staring at her in amazement, "I don't think I've ever heard you tease someone before."

"Teasing? I was just pointing out…" Lily suddenly felt very bad, "I'm sorry Luther. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

"And she's back." Maya rolled her eyes, "You have got to grow a spine Lily."

Lily pouted and they walked in awkward silence for a minute.

"I've got an idea," Luther said, "let's all go do something really fun tonight. Something really… Dauntless."

"Like what?" Lily asked.

"Like," Luther looked around the hall they were in, as if expecting an idea to jump out at him. He froze and a huge smile stretched across his face, "Like get tattoos!"

"Sounds fine to me." Maya shrugged.

"I don't know, I don't think I want to get something permanently inked on my body on a whim." Lily had actually been planning a tattoo design for a while, she even had a sketch in her bag, but it just wasn't ready.

"But you still wanted to check out the shop, right?" Maya asked, "didn't you get in trouble on the first day for stopping in front of it."

"I guess I did. Okay, let's go."

They made their way over to the tattoo shop, which was mostly empty. In one corner, a woman with black and green hair was pressing a black patch attatched to a tube to a man's arm.

"What's happening over there?" Lily asked.

"That's how they do the tattoos." Luther told her.

"I thought they used needles."

"We have a couple different methods," a voice behind them said. They turned and saw a man behind the payment counter. "if you want one of our classic designs, that's those on the wall, then we can put them on in a couple minutes using the lasers. If you want anything custom then we either use a tattoo machine, that's this thing here," he held up something that kind of looked like an upside down spray can with a needle and a handle, "or we can do it manually. That means I just take a big needle and poke you a few hundred times by hand."

Lily was now absolutely terrified by this man, and by the looks on their faces, she imagined Maya and Luther were too.

"So, any of you know what you want?" The man asked.

"I think we'll just look around." Lily said, composing herself.

"Alright, my name is Adam, come find me when you decide."

The three teens split up, browsing around the shop. The designs were all really pretty, but Lily just couldn't see her putting any of them on her body. She went back over to Adam's desk.

"Excuse me?" She said, her voice coming out tinier than she'd have liked, "Do you think I could show you a design I've been working on? Please?"

Adam looked her over for a minute before nodding, "Sure, what've you got?"

She took her sketch out of her bag a laid it on the table. The sketch was of a girl with long blonde hair and a flower crown, surrounded by flowers that blended together into a tie-dye sort of pattern. Mixed into the flowers, one could vaguely make out the symbols of each faction.

"I was thinking about doing it as a sleeve." She told Adam.

"You made this?" she nodded. "It's good, really good. I'd make the outlines of the flowers darker but otherwise it's great. You're a new initiate, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, we could use artists like you here. Have you thought about what you're doing after initiation?"

"Is that your way of asking me to work here?" She said hopefully.

"Don't get too excited," he held up his hand, "you've still got a long way to go. But I'd consider it"

"That would be amazing!" Lily squealed.

"What'd I say about getting excited? Moving on, a design like this is going to take hours, not to mention it'll be expensive. We usually charge based on the size of a tattoo, but since this is going to have to be done with the machine instead of laser work it'll be more like an hourly rate. I'd estimate it around 60 points. I doubt you've got that much right now."

"No, I don't, but thanks for the estimate." Lily folded up her sketch and began to walk away.

"Did I mention employees get a discount?" Adam called after her.

Lily was feeling pleased with herself for the rest of the night. In the end, only Maya had actually gotten a tattoo, a black rose on the back of her hand with a thorny stem curling around her arm.

"It's kind of perfect for you." Lily told her that night, "You know, it's small and beautiful, but also dangerous. Just like you."

"Yeah, sure. 'Cause everyone thinks I'm so dangerous." Maya frowned.

"I do, I know you think everyone underestimates you, but I think you're really brave."

"Why? You don't know anything about me."

"I know you transferred here when you knew no one would take you seriously. I know you fight just as hard as I do to be respected here. And you aren't afraid to fight dirty either."

Maya smiled and grabbed Lily's shoulder, "You're brave too, Lily. You really are."

**Side Note: To the guest user who told me that they would stab my eye with a butter knife and/or kill me if I didn't continue to update, please don't make comments like that again. I know you were just trying to be funny or impassioned or something and I'm sure you didn't mean it literally, but I've seen Misery a few too many times so please let's keep reviews friendly. **


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